Friday, November 4, 2011

ANOTHER. . . .

Up and down night, all night, oh well and I have a crap load of stuff to do today.
Been thinking about Christine lately.
Especially since paranormal just came out w/ a new release. She would have insisted that we go see it, so we could sit and laugh and then talk about how stupid it was later on.
I really do miss her, and it's been about a year since she passed.
Sometimes I think if not for her I don't know how I would have made through all that disgusting chemo.
We would sit there and just laugh, tell jokes, talk about the hoarder show on TV and the old people getting chemo would just stare at us like we were crazy.
But honestly, that's how you make the best out of a bad situation, laughter.
I can't ever forget the time we tried to escape while still attached to our chemo poles. (iv's and all)
We made it to the door, and were heading down to the pharmacy for a candy bar and something to drink...Yes, my idea. but we were caught and then labeled Thelma and Louise, and told to never do that again. Poor Dr. K, thought she was going to have a stroke.
Christine and I just clicked, and we understood each other. She had been through so much more than me. She had uterine cancer, and already gone through chemo, and had several surgeries at that point. Talk about strong, and again I believe she was an example for me in some ways.
I miss her and having a friend that truly knows what you are going through really makes the difference. Even if we didn't see each other that much we would text when she was up to it. She was in and out of the hospital so much towards the end and I am glad I was able to see her and make her laugh.
The hardest part was when she asked me what she should do. Keep on fighting or just go with it.
Talk about a heavy conversation. I didn't know what to say at first, but I won't forget it either, I asked her how she felt, was she tired what did she think about the choices she had. She could not do another chemo. She had so much going on cancer wise and I think it was just too much as she passed quickly after our last visit. Glad I saw her.
I thought writing a little about her would make me feel better but right now it just makes me really sad.
Gonna be one of those days I guess, and well it's OK.
Next week I have an interview for some volunteer work, so hopefully that will work out because I feel it will be really rewarding and good for me as well. See what happens!

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